WILKOMMEN
:3
Bill Kaulitz is teh seks. <3
I also wish for world peace, end of poverty,happiness and justice for everyone. :]
hello, this
is my temporary blog (click on the word 'this')
no idea why, but the blogskin for that blog doesn't work for this one.
you'll be pleasantly surprised when you go to that blog :] and until i get sick of that blogskin, i'll be posting there from now on.
so, temporary ta-ta, everyone! [:
twisting beside myself @2:49 PM
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
SO.
Nothing to talk about, no feelings except zombieness if there ever was such a feeling, no apparent weight loss, totally stuffed my face with sinful things today which i'm probably going to take forever to burn off, i can't believe i'm going to go live alone without my family next year, nor can i believe that i take 3 days to read about 200 pages, and i haven't started studying physics, or for that British Council exam.
Basically i've just been appalled at myself.
twisting beside myself @2:24 PM
Monday, November 17, 2008
I find it really tragic when people who don't even know how much they mean to you make an assumption based on a warped misunderstanding, and decide to remove themselves from your life.
I'm hoping for the best, but if it comes true, it's going to be pretty empty.
Anyway, on a lighter note, prom was two days ago! I couldn't update yesterday because gym wore me out. It wore me out today as well, which is why i'm using what little energy i have left to update.
Lol i'm chatting with my older brother on msn now, and just now he went off for lunch for a while, so his good friend and room mate, sam, took over:
-[NaZ]- Feel the pages turn to stone. says:
naz is lunching
-[NaZ]- Feel the pages turn to stone. says:
sam here
-[NaZ]- Feel the pages turn to stone. says:
hahahaha
-[NaZ]- Feel the pages turn to stone. says:
he(bill) isnt gd looking !
are you aware of how goddamned pretty you are? says:
lol! hello
-[NaZ]- Feel the pages turn to stone. says:
i thought it was a girl
-[NaZ]- Feel the pages turn to stone. says:
a manly girl
-[NaZ]- Feel the pages turn to stone. says:
ughghgh
-[NaZ]- Feel the pages turn to stone. says:
like those u see in the changi village thingy in spore <-(HAHAHA WHUTTT. don't know how he knows it, he's malaysian)
-[NaZ]- Feel the pages turn to stone. says:
hahah
are you aware of how goddamned pretty you are? says:
.....
are you aware of how goddamned pretty you are? says:
k you're not the first to say he's a gay/fag/tranny
are you aware of how goddamned pretty you are? says:
i don't know, i have weird taste i suppose
-[NaZ]- Feel the pages turn to stone. says:
cause he is
are you aware of how goddamned pretty you are? says:
i like feminine men and
-[NaZ]- Feel the pages turn to stone. says:
thats not even feminine man
are you aware of how goddamned pretty you are? says:
and androgyny, in general
-[NaZ]- Feel the pages turn to stone. says:
he crossed way far the line
-[NaZ]- Feel the pages turn to stone. says:
hahaha
Glawlz. -_-
And i honestly don't know why people think Bill sounds like a girl in Monsoon. Does he, really? I thought so at first, when my dearest friend KILLER STARE (LAWL) introduced me to the band, but after a while it sounded guyish, didn't it?
)=
WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE.
By the way, speaking of Bill, this is another video mocking Tokio Hotel. It's called Tokyo Motel and it's sort of a series... I find this one particularly hilarious
(What 'Bill', who's obviously a girl actress, says in the video:
That's all?
Sissy.
Mummy! I wet my bed again!)
And i looooooooovee what she's wearing.
I feel like a zombie, to be honest. I've shut my blog out completely for the O's and now that I'm back I don't really know what to say.
Ironically, thousands of things have been running through my mind the whole of the Olevels and i was thinking of putting them down here but it seems like everytime i'm at the computer those thoughts leave me.
One thing i've noticed, though, is that when you're out of the house during the holidays, no negative or stupid thoughts creep up in your mind. Because your mind is fully occupied.
Which is why i make it a point to go out everyday. To the gym, mostly. Which wears me out and by the time i get home i can't do anything much except sleep or read books.
There have been a couple of things which make me feel down.
Firstly, i feel like an undeserving shit. Seriously, if God exchanged places with an orphan or some disabled kid i bet they'll all appreciate my life better. I feel like an ass taking so much from my parents with so little in return.
I was just looking through my college fees the other day. And believe me when i say this: they are exorbitant, not even including where i'll stay, which will add on to the cost.
I suppose i'll have to make sure every penny spent on the college is worth it (i.e, bring home great results. Which isn't impossible, my brother's doing really well in his college) .
And when i start working i'm immediately going to give my parents back a lot of money. I feel really awful. I've been given so much in life and didn't use them properly and i know i'm going to be held accountable by God for every single thing i've wasted (which actually, is everything.)
Secondly, don't mean to sound whiny. But diets get you really down. I found out today i've already lost 3 kg. Which is good but.. not enough.
Not enough, damn it.
I never realised it, but i actually think i want to be skinny. If not for health, then it's for the 98% of clothes in my closet i don't wear.
Don't worry though, i won't do anything to harm myself like being bullimic, etc. I'm not that disciplined anyway.
I'll just go through the normal, difficult way - watch what you eat and exercise. I just wish it will be really quick, i'm going abroad not very long from now and i still have (x-3)kg to lose.
Looking back, one thing that appalls me most about secondary school is, how in hell did i gain so much weight? Don't expect me to tell you how much, you'll gawk in disbelief.
I'm planning to lose a lot of weight now but it's so difficult. The time constraint (i.e, slightly more than one month), the tiring workouts and my occassional moments of weakness (when i succumb to stupid delicious chocolate.)
This is the most disciplined i've been in my secondary school life. I want to lose weight, I really do. But it's going to be hard.
Likewise, it's going to be hard to do well in my college. Mother tells me the leap from O's to A's is huge. But i can't let her down. I can't let anyone down anymore.
Which brings me to another topic - Disappointment.
But i'm too tired now, and too worn out. I suppose i've just blurted the things i've been thinking about for a while. Maybe when i have inspiration i'll blog, not when i don't know what to say and have to force something out of my head.
Goodbye, have a good and fulfilling life, everyone. Don't waste life, you'll never get the time you wasted back.
-_- tsk.
twisting beside myself @3:52 PM
Saturday, November 15, 2008
So, the O'levels are like,
OVERRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)))))))))))))))))))))))
(One of the brackets is a smile, the others are chins. -_-)
Looking back, i know i should have worked harder, and i definitely don't think i'll be getting below ten now (-_-).
And whenever i was sad/depressed during the exam period, i'd sneak to the computer and watch this video
):
And I'm very, very strangely still in the exam mood, like i woke up early today and wasn't tired, and i still feel the urgency to study something! (Lawlz i read aishah's blog, contrasts greatly with how she feels don't it)
Well technically i still do. I'm going to take all three sciences and maths in my college and i have to read through the basics of physics (YIKES), and in three weeks' time i have to take this english exam from British Council. All this before i go overseas. Which is in january.
)=
I feel weird and dead today.
Today's prom and i'll look like a ketupat in what i'm going to wear.
I'm going to meet ida soon at tampines mall cos atifa can't make it and aishah most probably can't either.
My tummy is huge, my thighs are worse than thunder, my ass is made up of two globes.
BUT I HAVE A GYM MEMBERSHIP NOW!! Gyms are fun! You get to do classes with all these people and two hours pass by like that and you'll be burning fats! AND, you don't feel like eating a lot after that cos you're like, gosh, THIS is the amount of effort i need to put in to lose that amount of weight?
GALALALALALALALALALALAA
Since it's after the O's now, I want to lose x amount of kilos :)
hahahahahahhahaha i be crapping.
ok this is a parody of Tokio Hotel, and i think the person acting as Bill is a girl (-_-).
Haha i don't know what she's saying but i find it funny somehow.
Haha ok i'll buzz off now
twisting beside myself @4:32 AM
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
I AM A SINNERRR.
I'm supposed to be sleeping now. -_-
Anyway i can't help it! I just can't help it when i see an unattended computer which is switched on! I'll go to it and search for things like this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZc7lZGBd-U (sorry this computer is a stupid bitch that doesn't have microsoft word so i have embedding problems)
WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT. WELL I CERTAINLY DID/AM. I CAN'T HELP BUT STARE AT THOSE NICE EYEBROWS MOVING UP AND DOWN AND THOSE BEAUTIFUL EYES LINED WITH EYELINER.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND A WORD YOU'RE SAYING IN THAT VIDEO, BILL, BUT YOU ARE THE HOTTEST THING I KNOW.
-__- now i'm going to watch it one last timeee before i sleep. have fun for prom everyone! hehe. Can't wait to see what you all are wearing.
By the way, Tokio Hotel won the 'headliners' awards for the EMAs. And Bill's reaction is one worth squealing at for 1230978495465864587356375 seconds (which, being me, i did XD )
I loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooovvvvveeeeeee Bill Kaulitz, I want my husband to be like him HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE (Omg, i sound six.)
OK OK OK I'M SUPPOSED TO SLEEP NOW I'M SUPPOSED TO WAKE UP EARLY TO STUDY GOODNIGHT PEEPALZZ
twisting beside myself @2:30 PM
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