~headlock

WILKOMMEN

Saturday, August 15, 2009

WATCHED LADY GAGA LIVE THREE DAYS AGO! :D

as usual, we (mother, bros and i, dad thought gym was a priority over lady gaga lol) were late, thanks to my mother's patients who came in late and insisted that they should be seen :(

but thank God the thing started about 1hr 20mins later! she started the concert with 'paparazzi', with her crazy costumes and dancing. might i add that i was very impressed by her singing? SHE'S SO GOOD LIVE. :D

hahahaha and soooo vulgar, i shall tell you all when we're online or whenever i see you, can't be bothered to list down the whole thing here, lol.

she sang about ten out of twelve songs on her albums, and i was glad that i listened to the whole album before or else i wouldn't know the songs!

the last song was my faaaav. first she did an acoustic version of 'poker face' on her piano (a bubble one -__-) and did it very slowly, singing nonsense like 'sing sing singapore, i love chilli crab' in between. i was slightly disappointed cos i love the normal version of poker face, but suddenly after the whole song being played on piano the 'ma-ma-ma-ma' started and she sang the actual version and started dancing with her dancers :D

no encore, but obviously not! she only has one album out, what other songs can she sing? anyway fort canning was bloooody hot (which she pointed out herself, after a costume change she announced that she just 'took a fucking shower because it's so hot!') and i managed to get a lady gaga shirt :D

the next night was keane, but i didn't go cos i don't really know their songs, though i heard they were fabulous and the lead singer was drenched with sweat. fort canning is such a bad place for concerts -_-

anyway i've decided to stop blogging really stupidly emotional posts for now. i've been depressed and down for the better part of this year, and i have begun to realise that life is just too damn short to always get depressed over the most retarded things. seriously, sometimes i look back on things that brought me down before and i realise how absolutely trivial they were.

and i'm proud to announce here that i'm over that 'problem' that i had. it doesn't matter if the bad people in the world don't apologise. they have the burden of sins on their shoulders, they have to face God. i've got nothing to worry about and my conscience is clear.

i couldn't have done it without a friend i suppose. it doesn't matter if it was a lie or not. because 1) it was done out of a good intention, lie or not
2)she knows this thing almost drove me off the edge and wanted to help me get over it and have closure
3) i've come to realise boys are extremely immature. not stereotyping everyone of them but they are in general. either that, or they're quite stupid when it comes to emotions. or both. so i'd rather them be clueless than think they're righteous when they're wrong.

(shall tell you guys more when i meet you or if you're online)

okay that was the last time that whole issue is ever going to be mentioned here. the point is, now, i leave my fate in God's hands, whatever happens, happens, and whatever i want which doesn't happen wasn't meant to be in the first place. any problem that i have is surely a test, because what is life without tests? just as long as i know that i tried my best in every possible way, it shouldn't matter to me.

lol that whole paragraph sums up my life motto o_o

anyway, today, or rather yesterday (for it is 3am now) was friday, and i usually work on fridays.

for the previous fridays i have to admit i was very lazy. the worst possible dental assistant alive. i didn't do much but stand around, i ate, drank and went to the toilet as and when i wanted, and i always requested to go home early (to take a nap).

however yesterday was different. i actually did work, i learnt a lot more than i did the previous fridays, and i took less breaks. this might not sound like what you expect but dentistry is actually very interesting. i now know what happens during braces cases, root canals, crowning, wisdom teeth extractions (the most bloody ones) , gum lasering etc.

i just hope i gathered enough work experience before i go for any interview :/

i seriously want to get into kings' college london because it's probably the university with the best dental faculty. i don't mind any other universities that i've chosen with my parents too. just as long as i get into the dental faculty!

but if i don't get into that faculty, just as my mother who 'from young knew she wanted medicine' did not get it, like what i said above it's God's will. or perhaps even a blessing in disguise. i don't know, i just try to go down that path, if it's not meant to be there's nothing i can do about it but accept it.

Lastly, today at about 12am i watched the movie 'Up' in 3D. it is REALLY good, very touching, heartwarming and sad. and the best thing about it is that the plot is so unconventional!!!! :D it's something only unconventional writers like neil gaiman can think about, though it wasn't written by neil gaiman. MUST WATCH! my second favourite cartoon movie to 'find nemo'.

okay then, i have to sleep now. gym tomorrow morning. do pray for me, results are in five days' time :/

twisting beside myself @3:21 AM

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

it's been a long time since i've blogged properly.

i've recently bought myself a diary, so i suppose i don't see the need to blog anymore. i don't know if i should abandon this blog ; i always go to my blog on my father's laptop and on the 'popular' websites it's listed, and the last thing i want is for everyone in my family to read my thoughts.

but to be honest the term 'online diary' is in itself a contradiction - why publicise your personal thoughts for the whole world to read?

thus, i resort to the diary now. i don't think i'll abandon this blog, maybe post small updates up. everything else goes into the book.

you know, it just seems that many times people focus on stupid nitty-gritty details that the whole big picture becomes irrelevant and even stupid. but that's not the case at all. i'm not talking about anyone in particular, i'm referring to the things i've seen and observed.

forgive me if i seem like a changed person. i don't really think i am. i'm still perhaps the same at my core,although slightly more bitter, but a bit rougher at the edges.

and i'd like to thank God for giving me the privilege of me studying abroad because it opened up my eyes - a lot.

twisting beside myself @1:42 AM

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